The other day, someone called me a liar behind my back. This in itself was a lie, or perhaps an ego-driven attempt to save face. Maybe it was something else. It doesn’t matter.
Anyway, here are some unconnected thoughts about lying.
- Lies destroy communication. Perhaps irreversibly. Our reputation as communicators is all we’ve got. Can you really afford to throw that away? In the business of war fighting I want to believe every single thing my fellow Soldier has to say. Do you want it to be the rule only sometimes? Is ‘most of the time’ good enough? No.
- Lies create more work. Connect your name to enough fake news and you will inevitably have to clean up the confusion. The reporters, leaders and professionals we work with are smart. They are getting similar information from other sources, and noting inconsistencies.
- Lies are comfortable. Aren’t we in the business of making problems disappear? If a small lie helps everyone get back to the mission, where’s the harm? I guess it depends on how you prioritize the moment you’re in against long-term credibility. Slippery slope, buddy.
- Lies are inconsistent with our culture. We’re talking military leadership here; ever heard a general officer stand up and say “sometimes it’s okay to lie” with a straight face? A liar is like that old viral photo of the fit Marine with the extra large Army dude wearing PTs in a DFAC. When your actions are inconsistent with the culture, people notice and remember. And make memes about it.
- Lies are unnecessary. There’s a lot I cannot control, but I am in full control of each syllable exiting my mouth. Are you bumping up against a lie? Tell the truth if you can. If it’s a conversation you can exit, like with a reporter, simply stop talking. Get off the X. Go check your facts, change the conversation, or simply divorce yourself from the issue. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” goes a long way.
- Lies are cowardice. Accept responsibility and take responsibility for your actions. “I was late cause I stayed up too late” is a lot different than “My alarm clock didn’t go off.” The former is accepting responsibility. The latter is cowardice. Do you take responsibility for your actions and the actions of your team? You do if you’re a leader.
In a way, I’m advocating for Maximum Disclosure and Minimum Delay. It’s not like we’re running a blog called “False Disclosure.”
Notes:
- “Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them” has been on my reading list for a couple years. Maybe it’s time to break it out – any thoughts/reviews from our readers?
- Online bullying sucks. I deliberately didn’t include or link to the photo mentioned above. Our best to the human being who had to face the harassment.
(Photo by Staff Sgt. Daniel Phelps, DVIDS)
