Big Dad Dave C. – my father and the source of my name, bald spot and U.S. Army commission – turned 70 this weekend.
This retired Army Reserve major was also my elementary school gym teacher. His most consistent lesson was, “If you can’t be the best, be the nicest.”
This is his philosophy in sports and in life. We should apply it as Public Affairs practitioners, too.
Face it: you and your organization aren’t always going to be the best. Mistakes will be made, disagreements will happen, and you will get some things wrong. When times are tough and you can’t be the best, you’re going to have to calmly, politely, “nice” your way through it. In doing so, you’ll preserve, if not build, credibility for the next time.
This post directly contradicts what I wrote 9 months ago, in “Mr. Nice Guy.” It’s nuanced but I strongly stand by both this post and that. Professionals can apply grace and humility in the face of adversity without being a pushover. Clear communicators can politely double down on forever lines, and offer concise context without seeming bitter or angry.
Maybe the MaxDisclosure version of Dad’s saying is, “If you can’t be the best, just be a good dude.”
Because if people don’t want to work with you, they won’t.
Happy birthday, Dad. Thanks for this lesson.
(Photo by Cpl. Tamara Cummings, DVIDS)
